I leaned over a table one February night. I demanded the most handsome man at the bar to sit next to me.
We drank, laughed and sang out loud. I didn't know that night would change the course of my life this year.
He's a monster. He's done some horrible things to me that he cant take back. He's humiliated me. He's pulled me down to his level.
I cant blame him. I let him. His kisses swept me off my feet. His charm woo'd me and our chemistry was electric.
Ive ran into him and even made the mistake of meeting him to hear an apology. Which he never gave me.
But what did he teach me? He taught me that I love myself more. I may love him. Not IN love with him, but the glimpses of the nice guy he could be. Keyword: Could.
Anyways. I walked away with my self-worth.
I now refer to him as Mr.Cochino here.
I don't know who I'll end up with. Certainly not him. But I thank him for seeing I can walk away from anything or anyone who doesn't serve me any positive or good in my life.
I thank him.
For being the heartache that built part of my inner wolf.
I have walked away from all things and people who don't do my any good. He was the base for that.
Why he misses me? I don't have any clue.
Maybe it's the fact he doesn't have anyone taking his crap.
A lesson of 2014 for sure.
1 comment:
...I am glad that you are out of such an unhealthy relationship... Stef, you have to realize that there is a happiness in being alone and that letting someone flash a cute smile is not the best way to go ... not that it doesn't mean that a cat isn't the one, but there are things of substance that are "tells"... once you see them, then that is what they mean, that a person isn't who they purport themselves to be...
You are too beautiful a SPIRIT to suffer the company of such idiots... take care of your heart... take care of yourself..!
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