Return of The Stef

 

I'm Baccckkkkk! I know its been a Year and two months since I have even touched this blog and I guess you can say A LOT has happened. For one,  I got married! Daniel and I had a beautiful wedding and we honeymooned in Mexico. Hows married life you may ask? In some ways, it's harder. I guess because it's more of a commitment and "'til death do us part." Lol, does that make sense?

I gained 30 pounds, hence the picture above. I think, No, I know this why I am depressed lately. As much as I love myself, at the moment  I am so busy being a mom, wife and step mom, I am forgetting to put myself FIRST. This is what is depressing the crap outta me. If I am gonna be brutally honest, It's mainly being a step mom. I love my stepson. However, when Daniel and I got engaged, his ex was on the phone talking about how I cant love her son and I am not a replacement. Which is weird, because I don't even try to be my stepsons mom. I'm just here to help guide him and give him extra love. We all know that's her insecurity as a mother and woman talking. I hope she heals. So as far as communication-there is none. Between any of us. We have caught him in several lies and he often comes here, makes trouble and says, "My mom told me too." He's gonna be 16 you guys. I try my hardest not to lash out on him, I actually haven't. Some of the stuff he does though-IT'S SAD AND HURTFUL. I hope some day he will see how much I love him.

Enough about that, I just eat my feelings away.  Which I know isn't the "Cure" but I am trying to get back down to my most comfortable weight. I am trying to be FULLY happy. 

Noah is getting so big! He's THREE you guys! THREE! He's so funny, smart and bright! He truly has saved me. Motherhood is ROUGH but I wouldn't trade it in the world!

So that's that! I am back and hopefully you guys are doing well yourself! 

Here's to a new year with love!